Madzinga-Chinembiri
is also an author.
Titled “5 Years
A Divorcee,” the memoir chronicles her journey of healing and growth after her
19-year marriage ended in divorce.
The
46-year-old, shares the lessons she picked and the things she wishes someone
had told her before she took the step.
The mother of
four shares her story of love, loss, and transformation, offering a raw and
honest account of her experiences as a divorcee.
In an interview
with Zimpapers Arts and Entertainment Hub, Madzinga-Chinembiri said she wrote
the book as a way of challenging societies to confront the cancer of broken
marriages.
“I wish
societies, and especially churches, are more willing to sit down and talk about
divorce.
“It’s not a
taboo subject. Many marriages throughout the world are in turmoil and married
people should not sweep their problems under the carpet.
“I wrote my
book as a way of challenging society to confront the cancer of broken marriages
that has blanketed our families.
“At least, we
had 19 years, some couples are divorcing within a year of marriage.
“I encourage
those of us who have gone through the painful journey of divorce to openly
share with others so that they do not repeat our mistakes.
“I equally
encourage those who are married to humble themselves and take heed to the words
of divorcees like myself because you can learn one or two things.
“No one sets
out to fail in life but it takes a lot of courage to rise again after failing
in marriage.
“It takes even
more courage to lay it down for others and say here is where I went wrong.”
One of her
biggest surprises was when her ex-husband removed her from his medical aid and
funeral policy, leaving her feeling vulnerable and uncertain.
“I never
thought he’d do that. It was a harsh reality check, and I wish someone had
warned me about it.
“We were
married for 19 years and had for children, two girls and two boys.
“Our marriage
broke down due to broken vows and perhaps it was because we married too young
at 20 and 23 before finding our feet in the world.
“While the
marital relationship between us broke down irretrievably, we always agreed on
putting our children first ahead of our personal desires.”
During her
marriage she and her children were used to a luxurious lifestyle of trips but
for her the past five years things have been different.
“The first two
years were very hard but I learnt to downsize and downgrade our lifestyle.
“We have not
gone on any holiday in the last five
years with my kids but we do have other cheaper ways of pursuing
recreational activities.
“I am now used
to smaller fuel-efficient cars and the bigger cars we owned years back are now
just a memory.
“However, I
have always been a hard worker and I learnt to run multiple streams of income.
“I ran a
catering and baking business while pursuing a professional career as a
Financial Literacy Educator.
“He has always
been fully hands on in his children’s lives and he paid all their school fees,
we also share their daily living expenses.”
Theodora also
shared how her family’s unwavering support helped her navigate the challenges
of divorce.
“My maiden
family was very supportive of whatever decision I made.
“In the seasons
where I worked hard to stay married in spite of our problems, they stood with
me.
“And when I
announced that I had finally decided to file for divorce, three of my sisters
contributed to pay my lawyer.
“Outside of my
family, I faced rejection from some sections of society and some people stopped
talking to me because I filed for divorce.”
Besides being
an author, Theodora is a Soft Skills Trainer who specialises in financial
literacy education, personal development, self-motivation and optimal
productivity.
Her training
career spans over 20 years and includes training assignments within Zimbabwe
and in other countries such as Tanzania, Indonesia and recently Uganda where
she participated in the Aflatoun International Social and Financial skills
training for African youths.
Her best work
includes being one of the facilitators for the Old Mutual On The Money
programme from its inception in 2014, to date. H Metro
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