Ndileka Mandela set social media abuzz when she took to
Facebook to reveal her five-year secret. She said she was raped by her former
boyfriend in her bedroom.
Ndileka said on
Tuesday that she was following in her grandfather’s footsteps by speaking about
a personal ordeal.
“He was willing to announce to the world the loss of his
son‚ my uncle Makgatho‚ to HIV/Aids‚” she said.
“Granddad did this
to unite the world to take urgent action to address this illness‚ which knows
no boundaries of race‚ status‚ age or gender. This was at a time when there was
a great stigma with regard to HIV/Aids. Similarly‚ I am raising my personal
experience with sexual abuse‚ to remove the stigma‚ to be a voice for those who
are unable to raise their voices and as a call for concerted action by all to
address and eradicate this plague from society.”
Read Ndileka’s story:
WARNING GRAPHIC CONTENT
“August 9th 2012 is
a day that will remain etched in my mind.
That is the day my —
- partner (ex‚ now) raped me.
Yes RAPED. A lot of
men still think that rape between partners is a strange phenomenon.
The day started well
until I had lunch with my partner about his finances or lack thereof.
In retrospect‚ I
think the assault was a lesson for me to never question him again.
The conversation ended
quite well or so I thought.
Later that evening
when the security at the gate were buzzing my unit to find out if they should
let him in‚ I said yes even when my gut told me not to (something I never do
anymore‚ ignoring my gut).
He came up to my bedroom
and I told him I was tired and wanted to sleep. He went down stairs ... to
watch a game with my son. He came up to bed later and started kissing me‚ I
told him to stop as I was premenstrual and my breasts were tender and I just
wanted to sleep.
He did not listen‚ continued to kiss me while taking my
underwear off. He kept both my arms pinned above my head as he penetrated me.
I said no so many times. He kept thrusting over and over
again and I started crying.
He still would not
stop until I promised him I would never refuse him sex ever again. Being the
stubborn person I can be when I’m right I kept refusing through my tears.
He only stopped when
I began sobbing uncontrollably. I could not scream as I did not want my son to
find me in that compromising position.
Yes I never reported for the same reason most women do not
report what has been described acquaintance rape. I will not be silent. Rape
knows no social class‚ colour or creed.”
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